Never Lost her
by Chibimax
Summary: Jeff tells about Lucille and Virgil. How he had lost Lucille and how he didn’t look at Virgil when he was young and alone, until now.


_Never Lost her_

_Me: Jeff tells about Lucille and Virgil, How he had lost Lucille and how he didn't look at Virgil when he was young and alone, until now. _

_Disclaimer: I don't own Thunderbirds, thy belong to Gerry Anderson._

_-_

It's been all 20 years ago since my wife, Lucille, had died. She had a accident when we where skiing, in the alps. Scott, John and I where skiing of a helling. Virgil, Gordon and Alan where with Lucy. Virgil had stayed with his mother, because he wasn't so good with skiing, Gordon could only walk then and Alan was only a baby.

When the boys and I came back, Lucy had ask me if I would like to watch Gordon and Alan, while she is skiing with Virgil. The boys and I where watching Virgil and Lucy skiing. Virgil fell and had trouble with standing up again. So Lucy had came to help him up, when suddenly a avalanche came, right at Virgil and Lucy.

They couldn't get fast enough away from it and the avalanche took them with it.

Rescuers where digging Lucille and Virgil out. I was standing on the sideline with my boys. There was nothing I could do. I had want to help but one of the rescuers had said that I had to stay with the boys and wait till they had found Virgil and Lucy. God I had felt so helpless. I want to do something, but I couldn't.

After a half hour they had found Virgil and Lucy. Quick as possible, they had taken them and us to a helicopter and had fly us to a hospital. I had Virgil in my arms when we here flying to the hospital. They had said that I had to keep him awake or otherwise he will come in to a coma. Scott had Gordon on his lap and John, Alan.

When we had arrived on the hospital roof, they had taking Virgil out of my hands and taken him and Lucy inside. The doctors had said to me that we had to wait in the waiting room and that they will come to us when Virgil and Lucille were stable.

A full hours had past, when a doctor had came in the waiting room. I jump up when I saw him. I had almost awaked Alan from his sleep, he had fall asleep when we had to wait. The doctor had said that everything was good with Virgil, he just have now a cold and had to stay in bed for a week. I was a litte relieved, when suddenly the doctor's face had change in to a sad face. About that moment I knew there was something wrong with Lucille. The doctor had told me that Lucy was so cold, that they didn't get her heart back beating and that she had past away. My face suddenly had change in horror, Lucy… my wife …. Is dead ? Tears begun to run down on my face. The boys begun to cry too. Trough my tears I ask the doctor if I can see her. The doctor nodded and lead the way to my Lucille's room. When we came to her room he ask me, if he has to call someone to watch the boys. I said that if he can call my mother and tell her what happened and if she's here that she can bring the boys to here to say goodbye to them mother. I gave the doctor the phone number of mother and he leaved.

When the doctor was out of side, opened the door and I went to Lucille's bed, when she was lying peaceful. Oh god, why ? Why did you take her away from me ? I didn't do something wrong, but why her ? First had you taking dad and now Lucille. Why ? god why ? I cried. After a hour my mother came in the room and she hugged me. She tolled me how sorry for me she was and that the boys are standing outside to say goodbye to there mother.

One by one the boys came in. Scott stood next to me crying as well. John and Virgil stood on the other side of Lucille's bed. After a hour had past mother had to pick up Virgil, because he didn't want to leave.

A full days later the funeral form Lucille had came. God, I remember it quit good. We stood on the graveyard then. It was a gray day, there was a cold wind and it was raining hard. After the priest had spoken and friends had gone away I called Scott, John and Gordon. I had Alan in my hands when I did that. When I had look a litte up I saw Virgil whit tears in his eyes, waiting for that I called him to come over… But I didn't call him. It was too must to hold Lucille's son in my arms. I look away then. When I did that mother had took his litte hand and they look at us when me and my sons where crying together.

After the funeral days had past. I was in the lounge (They had already moved to Tracy Island back then) working at my documents. Virgil sat by the piano and start to play the song that Lucille had taught him before we had going skiing. I stood up, when to go him and smashed the piano cover down. It was so loud that even mother came to see what was going on. I yelled to Virgil that he never ever may play that piano again and that he now has to disappear out of my eyes and that I don't want to see his face again for to day. He nodded and had gotten out of my eyes. When I turned my back I saw mother looking at me. I thought that she would give me comment but instead she turn back and walk to the kitchen.

The second day had break on. I was sitting in the kitchen when mother had told me that she had found Virgil in front the piano, in the middle of the night when she had laid Scott and John in bed. That he was crying and told her that he said that I didn't love him anymore. I look at mother and told her that I even can't watch him because he look like two drupes of water like his mother. That had made mother very angry and said that god had made Virgil like Lucille because god would take Lucille away from me, so that I always can look at her, to feel that she's still around me that I never had the feeling that I had never lost her. I with a angry look I thought that wasn't true. Before she left the kitchen she told me that I had taken everything from Virgil, when he had need the most. I was so angry that I yelled what the hell that was. She look also angry to me and she said that I had taken what almost every boy in this family had, my hands. Then she left the kitchen. Then I thought about the discussion I and mother had. Does Virgil really thing that I don't love him ? I love must as his brothers.

When 5 months had past thanks to his grandma, I had allow Virgil again to play the piano again. But when he begun to play a song of his mother I grumbled behind my desk that he has to play an other song.

A full years had past and Virgil is now 14 years old and studying at Denver School. I don't know why he had choose that school, but I think it's something whit inside beiing an Evans and outside a Tracy. Anyway in the years I've still trouble with looking at Virgil. He got very talented and I now that his mother would be proud of him. After the high school he when to the air force to work there as mechanic. He also had learn how to fly a airplane.

When I had started International Rescue, I had ask him if he would come onboard. He had accept it and is now the pilot of Thunderbird 2. when I was asking him to come aboard of International Rescue, I said that he has now more time to play the piano and to paint, but when I had said that he said that he doesn't paint and play the piano anymore.

"Well that have to change now, we don't want to throw your gifts away that your mother had giving you." I had said then.

Now I'm sitting the lounge, working on the files, listing to Virgil's music that he's playing write now. I look up and now I'm realizing what mother had mention in that discussion 20 years ago. That I never lost Lucille that she is still here…with me. Even when I don't see her, she's still laughing at me. Not that I'm crazy but I mean, when Virgil is painting or playing the piano, when he goes whit his hand in his hair, in his smile and laugh…I defiantly realize that I didn't lost her. I just had ignore her, because of her dead, I never had the chance to see her inside… of Virgil. She is still living. Living with me… even when I can't thought her, see her, I still feel that she is around me. She is even ride now in this room, she's living inside of her favorite son…. Virgil.

So now I stood up and walk to the piano and stood still on the side of it. When the song was done Virgil looked up and I said that was a nice song with a smile. He smiled back. Then I had ask him if he want to play a song that what his mother had thought him, before we went skiing in the alps. First he looked confused to me, but he start to play the song. I looked up and I saw mother standing in the door opening, smiling at me and Virgil. I nodded. Now I knew what she was talking the hole time. That Lucille was still living….living inside of Virgil and that I never lost her….

_Me: ok I don't know about you guys but I had to fight my tears back for not to cry. Please review and tell me what do you think of the story. Well see you next time bye_

Note: the day I had tolled on Lucille's funeral, was the same horrible day when my grandpa had died then. And I would never forget that day…


End file.
